Growing up I was a sucker for a good teen movie. Watching so many of them presented me with a pattern I didn’t know existed. Most,if not all had at least one character who had massive anxiety. I’m not talking about the subtle kind that made their palms sweaty when they met strangers, but the kind that made some of them have ‘panic attacks’ and struggle to breathe. Heck, I even saw one who used to crawl under her bed.

I used to think of it as a sorry cry for attention. Don’t get me wrong, I knew mental health was a huge problem but that extreme anxiety seemed like some circus drama. That was until I had my first panic attack.

Hi there, let’s talk about anxiety.

Why and when?

Most people confuse anxiety and panic attacks. The symptoms are pretty much the same but the major difference is that a panic attack may come randomly at any time but an anxiety attack is always triggered. 

Anxiety can be triggered by factors such as being in extremely stressful situations, side effects of certain medications, or even drug and substance abuse.

Different people experience it differently. For a majority it leads to shortness of breath, your chest tightens and your brain screams that you’ll collapse if you don’t suck in all the air in the atmosphere. Scary right?

For others, it manifests as an increase in heart rate, sweating, and trembling. Your body shakes like a leaf on a chilly day. This can be very embarrassing especially if it happens in public and you end up trending on social media. Sigh. 

Whereas for others it brings about compulsive behaviors such as back and forth pacing, picking, and biting of nails.

Let’s put on our bathing suits and dive deeper into the waters.

Comparison leading to anxiety

Life can be overwhelming at times and can give off the impression of falling into a bottomless pit with no one and nothing to catch you. If the fall had an end, relief would be provided but the fact that you never really know when it will get better is the scariest.

Comparing yourself to those around you only makes this worse. Especially if they seem to have it all figured out. You on the other hand are left wondering where you went wrong.

There are way too many motivational stories telling us not to do this but it remains another case of easier said than done. 

It’s habitual to compare yourself to others when you are in a confined environment such as school or in the same workplace but once you actually sit down and talk to them, you’ll realize how wrong they are. 

Let’s take the example of two couples, one poor and the other rich. The poor couple lives in a tiny one-bedroomed house with their three children while the rich live in their lavish mansion with their one child. The poor envy the rich for their wealth, for not having to struggle each day to put food on the table, etc. On the other hand, the rich couple has been trying for another child for five years and can’t understand why they can’t pop out babies like the poor couple.

This is a dramatic example but it shows that you never really know the internal struggles people have, even if they appear to be in a better situation. All you need to do is to focus on getting yourself out of your own pit and be better.

I also came to realize the people closest to me were the most different from me, and this is what attracted me to them in the first place. 

With this came the acknowledgment that each one of us is different pieces and sizes of a puzzle, no piece resembles the other but they all fit. We all fit. 

What to do

Like I mentioned earlier, anxiety attacks are triggered. More often than not they start as an innocent overthinking episode that spirals up as the snowball collects and grows bigger and bigger and soon enough, you have a mountainous snowball before you.

So whenever you feel overwhelmed by thoughts, stop everything and take a deep breath. I know this sounds like a cliche but you’d be surprised how efficient this is.

If it has already progressed to stage two (the actual attack) and your chest is heaving like a 100 meters runner, try and calm yourself down. Panicking at the moment will make the symptoms more profound as the fear will only serve to magnify the situation. Sit wherever you are, try to clear your thoughts, and focus on how your chest lifts and falls with each breath you take. If you have your phone nearby and have internet access, 

Talk to someone you trust. I cannot stress how important it is to have a support system. Call someone there and then, it doesn’t matter if they won’t be able to rush by your side but just knowing that there is someone out there for you will calm you down faster than when you are alone.

If your person is not available, you can put on nature sounds and listen to them. One of my favorites is https://youtu.be/ZI4746iRqIM. There is something about nature and peace that seem to align naturally. As you listen, clear your mind and relax your body.

Lastly, if you find yourself experiencing these attacks too often, seek medical assistance. There are some drugs that will help or you can even consider going to a therapist.

Millie ♥️♥️♥️